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“Sex is meant to be enjoyable and if it is not, loop in and find a solution,” suggests Dr. Additionally, let your partner and your doctor know. If having penetrative sex hurts, try changing positions, switching to oral sex, or consider mutual masturbation. “Many people suffer from a condition known as dyspareunia, which is pain associated with sexual intercourse,” she says.
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Now before diving into how to make sex better, ob-gyn Constants Adams, MD, notes that sex isn’t supposed to hurt (unless, of course, you and your partner agreed you want it to). “Mentally, it can improve depression and/or anxiety, boost self-esteem, and even ease stress.” “Physically, sex can help improve sleep patterns, lower blood pressure, increase your immune system, count as exercise, improve bladder control, and decrease the likelihood of prostate cancer,” says Dr. Other than the fact that sex usually feels actually fantastic, there are plenty of other reasons to have it as well. “If you only focus on orgasming, then you can miss the pleasure and experience of the whole intimate act.” “Good sex is about the journey, not the destination,” says Dr. Some don’t prefer any type of physical intimacy-and that’s okay too. Some people gravitate toward vanilla penetration, whereas others prefer oral or BDSM. “This might include snuggling, kissing, sexting, video chatting, flirting, fingering, sucking, grinding, humping, or penetrating, but this list isn’t exhaustive.” “Sex is anything that brings you erotic pleasure,” explains sexologist Jess O’Reilly, PhD, a global ambassador for WOW Tech. Now, there’s no universal definition of sex, so don’t think we’re just talking about penetration here. Not only does knowing what you do (and don’t) like sexually help you find pleasure-whether it’s solo or with a partner-but sex itself is a form of communication and self-care.
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“Humans are sexual beings, so to not work on your sex life and understand your sexuality is denying yourself full understanding of who you are,” she explains. Whether it’s having it, learning about it, or just thinking about it, therapist and sex expert Angela Jones, PhD, says sexual activity is pretty much the essence of human nature. Like puppy videos, sex is just one of those things most people can’t get enough of.